Half Baked, Whole Hearted

Let me start off by saying I have no clue what I’m doing…zero. It took me an obscene amount of time just to figure out how to even get to this page so I could begin writing a post. It would probably be helpful if I watched a YouTube video or two on how to use WordPress but I’m more of a figure it out as you go kind of gal…

Anyways, I’ve been thinking about starting a blog forever —  like circa 2010 —  so this has been a long time coming. In the past, when I seriously considered starting a blog, I always let Jan —  this is what I call my negative inner voice —  convince me that it would be a complete waste of time. (If your name is Jan, I’m sorry —  it’s nothing personal. I’m sure you’re a very nice person — my Jan, however, is a real b*tch.) Jan would come at me with all kinds of reasons as to why starting a blog was a terrible idea:

Your life is so incredibly boring. What would you even talk about?

No one, I repeat, no one cares what you have to say.

Even if a few people did read your blog…what would everyone who actually knows you think?

Obviously they’re going to think this is a very dumb way to spend your time considering you’re never going to be a “successful” blogger.

The blogging space is way too saturated already. No one is going to read your blog now. You could be the king of all blogging kings —  the great and powerful Seth Godin himself —  and still no one would read your blog today.

Shut up, Jan. You’re the worst.

Phew, that was a disturbing look inside the inner workings of my mind.

Maybe you’re wondering what finally got me to stick a sock in Jan’s mouth and publish this first blog post. Maybe you’re not. Either way I’m going to tell you.

Since leaving my full-time job back in June 2025 (yes, that’s 9 months ago) I’ve been in a very strange in-between state. I feel like I’m stuck in some sick game of pin the tail on the donkey where I’ve been blindfolded, spun around 15 times, and then told I have 60 seconds to decide what I’m going to do with the rest of my life before Mike Tyson himself punches me in the stomach as hard as he can. It’s a total mixed bag of panic, exhaustion, self-criticism, disorientation, and moments of revelation.

So here’s why I’m finally sitting down to start this blog: With Mike Tyson is hot on my heels, I’m choosing to explore new interests and paths for my life based solely on what I enjoy doing. Not what might make me the most money or earn me the most admiration. F*ck all that (excuse my language…I can be a bit of a swearer if you haven’t already caught onto that). Focusing on making more money and feeding my own ego led me to places I never wanted to end up. I refuse to do that again. I will not let life slip through my fingers leading an existence that feels soulless and empty.

This is my first step toward living my life purposefully from a place of curiosity, joy, and creativity.

I’ll be spewing all my random thoughts and bullish*t onto this blog regularly. I hope you’ll join me on this messy journey of self-exploration, growth, and healing. If nothing else, maybe you’re here for a front-row seat to watching me fall flat on my face over and over again.

Whatever your reason for being here, I hope you’ll stay awhile.